I don't think I will ever get use to it. Use to the feeling of being hurt by someone. Intentional or unintentional it stings with a bitter pain that can leave you gasping for air hours later.
Many have said that no one can hurt you unless you give them the power too; I don't necissarly disagree with that statement, however, do we not allot a certain amount of power to everyone in our lives? Think about it; our family has the power to hurt us because we unconditionally love them and our friends have the power to hurt us because we depend on them. It is no different in a relationship; we basically rip out our heart and deliver it in a bag marked "please don't destroy it". To me, that's power to hurt you, whether it's given with the expectation or not.
I've also heard conflicting ideas on whether or not it is better to be the person who cares more, or the person who cares less. They say if you're the person who cares less, you are typically the one that is hurt the most in the long run, not necessarily because the relationship (or even several more to come) but eventually, due to the fact that every human wants love and to be loved. Then, of course, there is the belief that being the one who cares the most is the one who is hurt the most, because, well you cared the most, so you are naturally affected the most. I'm not entirely sure which idea I believe as I can see both points of view, however, I am fully aware that I am always the one who cares the most.
I'm always the person who cares a little too much. In everything, not just relationships. My heart is open and tender and too often, I pour my whole heart into things and it comes back empty and it sucks. It really sucks. In those moments I promise myself I'll change. I won't give unconditionally or if I do I won't let it affect me if it comes back empty. But it does. It always affects me. Just like it always affects me when someone hurts me.
I guess it just comes down to the fact that sometimes you can care a little too much... but maybe that's okay, because maybe one day, you won't be the only one caring that much and one day it won't be empty and it will all be worth it. Maybe. One Day.
